30 Weeks

Dear Baby,
Now that you're 30, there's a few things we need to get straight. There will be no more lackadaisical days of your 20s left to be had. It's time to shape up. This staying up all night, kicking and tossing isn't going to make your "room" any larger. I promise. So please, stop ramming your head into my full bladder. Also, when I eat, please don't practice your flutter kicks into my full stomach. It's really quite uncomfortable. These little fits are just not becoming of a lady.

No, your job is now to behave like the little grown up fetus that you are. You should lie back and relax. Enjoy the last few weeks of vacation. Eat up, you still have 3-4 pounds to gain after all.

We look forward to meeting you at the ripe old age of 38-40 weeks, but also keep in mind that no one like someone who is too late to the party, if you know what I mean.

Lots of love always,
Your Mommy